There is a book called “The Giving Tree”, by Shel Silverstein.

I re-read it about every 10 years. Each time I read it I have a different reaction. Each time I read it, I receive a different message. Each time the message gets more powerful.

In short, there is a rather lopsided relationship between a boy and a tree. The tree loves the boy and gives the boy gifts. The gifts become progressively more and more sacrificial. The boy takes from the tree….. nothing more……no gratitude…….no reciprocation……. no appreciation of the sacrifice….nothing.

On the surface, it’s about giving and taking. For many years it was a metaphor for parenting and for my experiences as a parent. Lately, though, I have begun to experience the book as the child.

For most of my 30 or so years as a parent, I took a message from the book. It came in many forms. But, basically, the message was that parenting is not something that you do in order to fulfill yourself…….it is an exercise in learning how to give of yourself to others. I have learned that this ability to give to others is the secret of finding true happiness. I have found no other path.

Lately, I have come to know that in addition to being the tree(a parent), I am also the child(a taker). I take and take and take the gifts of God’s sacrificial love. Often, I don’t even recognize the sacrifice or say thanks. Just now, I’m beginning to explore how God, the tree, must feel about me as the child….and it’s humbling.

If you are a parent….. or are thinking about becoming one.

If you are a Christian…….or are thinking about becoming one.

If you are a tree……….or a child.

You need to read this book….every ten years or so.

If you are interested, here is a link to a you tube video of the author reading the entire book. It takes about 10 minutes. It will be worth your time.

Here is how judgement day will go for me.

I find myself in huge room. It’s a lot like customs at a large airport. I’m in a long line of strangers. They are all tired and strangely quiet. They are all shuffling forward. After what seems like hours, I reach the front of the line.

There is an old guy sitting on a stool behind a tall desk. It looks like something Bob Cratchet would have used. There is a very old, very large book on the desk. The book looks heavy. The old guy looks tired… it must be the end of a long shift. He’s not smiling……..come to think of it, neither is anybody in the room.

He opens the book and turns a couple of pages. He reads for what seems like a long time, then he looks up at me. He says, “would you care to explain this?” ………..as he gestures at the book. He’s still not smiling. This is not going well.

I try to assemble the stack of justifications, rationalizations, and excuses that I have used for a lifetime. I’m trying to find the one that will work……in this situation……in this place……with this man.

Then, I hear a voice behind me…….the voice says “It’s OK Peter……..he’s with me.”

The old guy gets a little half grin, and he motions me through.

As I walk past, he flips to the next page in the book……looks past me and says. …..”next”.

The little half grin is gone.

I worry a little about the next tired traveller in the line behind me….. and that is the reason for this blog.